Some of the Butter is too salty as isn’t too good for your heart! Some of the Butter is really cheap you know like tesco’s own! But the Butter I dislike the most is when “I cant believe its not Butter” meaning I have no idea if people are being honest or not.
Sadly the person on the buttery end of the knife can begin to believe their own legend after a while and this can reduce their defences. Reminds me of the cult of celebrity.
In church, by far the safest proposition is to be a total non-entity - someone who neither inspires nor offends. The ‘cult’ type figure, in my observations, has loads of fans who compete for the pole position which causes in-fighting and possible damage to the object of their affections. And, of course, the very fact of the ’star’s’ popularity winds up their oponents/potential assassins in the community.
Hi Susan. It’s just my opinion, really, based on personal observations. An alternative to the non-entity and the star is the one who believes the best form of defence is attack. I gather there are a few of those, too. I think you can apply this model to environments other than church.
We may well all be made in God’s image and none of us worthless…but that doesn’t make us immune to messing up…again…and again…and again…and again
5. I see this happen ALL the time here in the US emerging church circles - someone gets a bit of notoriety and next thing you know, what started out as a way cool ministry becomes all about them. I see this starting to happen when they use “I” instead of “we” to talk about the ministry. Also, as a religious journalist, I can tell I’m dealing with someone who loves the butter when I ask if I can speak to others involved in the project esp. those in the pews and no one else is available to talk to me.
So, is it the weight of the butter than causes the fall?
Or, perhaps, the body heat melts the butter and one slips and falls?
If our friend falls on a carpeted floor, he gets “fuzzed” and the carpet gets an ugly stain, he might be a “stumbling block” if someone was to trip over him!
…but if he falls on a slick floor, he will cause an enormous “oil slick” that will take many an innocent pedestrian down — oil being particularly difficult to remove from the floor surface.
Very funny. The guy on the left could be saying, “You’re toast!” in the second picture
I’m interested in what Becky says #12. Yet I’ve always liked how Americans I’ve met are so warm and generous with their compliments. Personally I like being told to have a nice day. Thank you, I’ll try, etc. But maybe if the compliments are too quick the giver of them speaks too soon and then the warmth abruptly fades?
In Scotland we tend to be a bit dour and the only time we praise folk is in the eulogy at their funeral when they can’t hear it and get big headed. We have a saying, “Ah kent yer faither” (I knew your dad) or in other words I know where you come from so don’t get too big for your boots. (Jesus got that too - “Can anything good come out of Nazareth?” and “Isn’t this the carpenter’s son?” Clearly they didna ken his faither…
What’s worse? To get no compliments at all or to have the scenario depicted in the cartoon? I don’t honestly know.
(Apologies to my lovely nation, incidentally. I’m exaggerating and generalising shockingly.)
20. What I am referencing is here in Christian America, we have what I’d term a religious rock star phenomenon. Certain leaders who are involved in a very dynamic and cutting edge ministry start to get a bit of press. All too often, an amazing communal ministry turns into a one man show replete with adoring fans, etc. (I find that a supportive community can keep the leader grounded and focused but often the community can get caught up in the buzz and there’s no one offering a reality check.)
As Jon’s cartoon aptly points out, this person who has been buttered up falls down when the fickle fans move on to the next big thing.
You see this a lot with hot young artists - amazing debut CD, book, art gallery show but then they crash and burn and are left all alone.
My favorite thing to do with a “butter you up” person is smear the goo right back on them… “Wooo no YOU are SO very very VERY talented and have MORE loads of AWESOME gifts and plenty to say and you are SO wise WISE WISE ….”
I am so there. Not my “love language” to be buttered up like that while being ignored. Ugh. - thanks for that.
Comment by Rick — March 26, 2008 @ 2:19 am
sort of like “I’m sorry, does this nice pointy object in my back belong to you?”
Comment by john Q — March 26, 2008 @ 3:12 am
Some of the Butter is too salty as isn’t too good for your heart! Some of the Butter is really cheap you know like tesco’s own! But the Butter I dislike the most is when “I cant believe its not Butter” meaning I have no idea if people are being honest or not.
Comment by dennis coburn — March 26, 2008 @ 8:05 am
Over the top flattery always makes me suspect ulterior motives - sad isn’t it?
Comment by Susan — March 26, 2008 @ 9:35 am
Sadly the person on the buttery end of the knife can begin to believe their own legend after a while and this can reduce their defences. Reminds me of the cult of celebrity.
In church, by far the safest proposition is to be a total non-entity - someone who neither inspires nor offends. The ‘cult’ type figure, in my observations, has loads of fans who compete for the pole position which causes in-fighting and possible damage to the object of their affections. And, of course, the very fact of the ’star’s’ popularity winds up their oponents/potential assassins in the community.
Comment by Carole — March 26, 2008 @ 11:13 am
Now I know why I meet so many non-entities in church!
Oops - sorry, there I go again, must remember we are all made in God’s image and none are worthless.
Comment by Susan — March 26, 2008 @ 11:24 am
Hi Susan. It’s just my opinion, really, based on personal observations. An alternative to the non-entity and the star is the one who believes the best form of defence is attack. I gather there are a few of those, too. I think you can apply this model to environments other than church.
We may well all be made in God’s image and none of us worthless…but that doesn’t make us immune to messing up…again…and again…and again…and again
Comment by Carole — March 26, 2008 @ 11:35 am
Ofcourse, when you land butter-side-down all the carpet fluff sticks to you and you get back up looking somewhat…icky.
Comment by Amie — March 26, 2008 @ 11:43 am
sorry rick.
john q. yeh, sort of like that.
dennis… margerine, even worse.
carole… you make it all sound so exciting.
susan… you’re referring to what i call ‘pew fodder’. problem is, they make up the numbers, so who’s going to want to offend them?
amie… eeeugh.
Comment by jonbirch — March 26, 2008 @ 12:36 pm
Yes Jon, I seriously ought to get out more!
Comment by Carole — March 26, 2008 @ 1:05 pm
haha!
Comment by jonbirch — March 26, 2008 @ 1:32 pm
5. I see this happen ALL the time here in the US emerging church circles - someone gets a bit of notoriety and next thing you know, what started out as a way cool ministry becomes all about them. I see this starting to happen when they use “I” instead of “we” to talk about the ministry. Also, as a religious journalist, I can tell I’m dealing with someone who loves the butter when I ask if I can speak to others involved in the project esp. those in the pews and no one else is available to talk to me.
Comment by becky — March 26, 2008 @ 2:09 pm
Jon,
You really must quit wandering around the darker areas of my life!
Another great one from your wonderfully accurate sense of humour.
Comment by Bill Kinnon — March 26, 2008 @ 2:22 pm
becky… that’s just plain weird behaviour… cultish even? hmmm.
bill k… sorry mate… and thanks.
Comment by jonbirch — March 26, 2008 @ 2:48 pm
Does the buttering up come in part just so the fall ends up being that much harder?
Comment by ron — March 26, 2008 @ 3:15 pm
Hehehe…
So, is it the weight of the butter than causes the fall?
Or, perhaps, the body heat melts the butter and one slips and falls?
If our friend falls on a carpeted floor, he gets “fuzzed” and the carpet gets an ugly stain, he might be a “stumbling block” if someone was to trip over him!
…but if he falls on a slick floor, he will cause an enormous “oil slick” that will take many an innocent pedestrian down — oil being particularly difficult to remove from the floor surface.
Oy, vey! What an image….
Comment by Peggy — March 26, 2008 @ 6:50 pm
Damn. this is the exact way I exited church forever about 5 years ago. Never been back. Never want to.
Comment by Daniel — March 26, 2008 @ 7:25 pm
Proverbs 16:18: “Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.”
Comment by Susan — March 26, 2008 @ 7:43 pm
14. Jon - I would say it goes more into cult of personality instead of following Christ. Weird, yes but it happens all the time.
Comment by becky — March 26, 2008 @ 8:34 pm
Very funny.
The guy on the left could be saying, “You’re toast!” in the second picture 
I’m interested in what Becky says #12. Yet I’ve always liked how Americans I’ve met are so warm and generous with their compliments. Personally I like being told to have a nice day. Thank you, I’ll try, etc. But maybe if the compliments are too quick the giver of them speaks too soon and then the warmth abruptly fades?
In Scotland we tend to be a bit dour and the only time we praise folk is in the eulogy at their funeral when they can’t hear it and get big headed. We have a saying, “Ah kent yer faither” (I knew your dad) or in other words I know where you come from so don’t get too big for your boots. (Jesus got that too - “Can anything good come out of Nazareth?” and “Isn’t this the carpenter’s son?” Clearly they didna ken his faither…
What’s worse? To get no compliments at all or to have the scenario depicted in the cartoon? I don’t honestly know.
(Apologies to my lovely nation, incidentally. I’m exaggerating and generalising shockingly.)
Comment by AnneDroid — March 26, 2008 @ 8:34 pm
20. What I am referencing is here in Christian America, we have what I’d term a religious rock star phenomenon. Certain leaders who are involved in a very dynamic and cutting edge ministry start to get a bit of press. All too often, an amazing communal ministry turns into a one man show replete with adoring fans, etc. (I find that a supportive community can keep the leader grounded and focused but often the community can get caught up in the buzz and there’s no one offering a reality check.)
As Jon’s cartoon aptly points out, this person who has been buttered up falls down when the fickle fans move on to the next big thing.
You see this a lot with hot young artists - amazing debut CD, book, art gallery show but then they crash and burn and are left all alone.
Comment by becky — March 26, 2008 @ 9:33 pm
My favorite thing to do with a “butter you up” person is smear the goo right back on them… “Wooo no YOU are SO very very VERY talented and have MORE loads of AWESOME gifts and plenty to say and you are SO wise WISE WISE ….”
Comment by Susan — March 28, 2008 @ 1:43 am
… unless you strap a cat to your back in a variation on the old perpetual motion machine gag.
Comment by Tim — March 28, 2008 @ 9:50 pm