inspired by something carole said…


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About jonbirch

animator, illustrator, character designer, graphic designer. music producer/recording musician. co-owner of PROOST. proost.co.uk
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42 Responses to 387

  1. kick-hat-snare says:



  2. kick-hat-snare says:

    rubberdingy rubberdingy rubberdingy rubberdingy rubberdingy rubberdingy rubberdingy rubberdingy


  3. patrick says:

    shouldaboughtahonda butiboughtahyundai

  4. thevikingfru says:

    shouldaboughtahonda shouldaboughtahonda shouldaboughtahonda

    This one gave me a much needed giggle, thanks Jon.

  5. thevikingfru says:

    sorry Patrick we must have been commenting at the same time:-)

  6. jonbirch says:

    that’s a… a… miracle…. i can feeeel it breakin’ out tonight! … ooooooh, mandolamandolamandolmandola! :-)

    seriously… i’m not against tongues… but sometimes y’gotta wonder! …first time my swazi sister spoke in tongues was in a hospital service. she was so upset by what came out of her mouth that she cried with the embarassment. amazingly, she’d spoken in the language of someone on the ward who was feeling particularly lost and isolated and it was very comforting for them. so tongues with a translation, or personal babbling when you have no words to express yourself is cool by me… but everyone making a racket, turning prayer into a drama etc. etc. not so sure.

    btw… a mandola is a little mandoline. :-)

  7. Nevertheless, in church I would rather speak five words with my mind in order to instruct others, than ten thousand words in a tongue. – 1 Cor 14.19

    If any speak in a tongue, let there be only two or at most three, and each in turn, and let someone interpret. 28But if there is no one to interpret, let each of them keep silent in church and speak to himself and to God. – 1 Cor 14.27-28

    ie speak in tongues only if there’s an interpreter, and be happy if there’s only teaching / preaching since it’s more useful than tongues.

  8. shelly says:

    Alternate caption: Tongues. (Or, Glossolalia FTW?)


  9. steve says:


  10. ben says:


    anyways i think what on salient oversight is very good. why? possibly had to do with the backup of the word is behind him.

    i once thought i could speak tongues. but this was when the music was playing, people had told me to say what was in my head or whatever, people were praying in there own “tongues” and it was very emotionally oriented. after that i tried it a few times, but nothing ever came and if i tried it felt very fake.

    so take caution if you find yourself in a situation like i was in. personally one of my gifts is not to speak in tongues. go for it if you know 100% that God is using you and its not just because of the emotion and peer pressure to try it!

  11. Man I was doing worship at this event once and the “leader” asked people to come forward to receive tongues (LOL) and then he said to them REPEAT after me…… he spoke his stuff and then expected them to say the same. It was well uncomfortable, God musta been laughing his head off!

  12. subo says:

    Captain Haddock shaves his beard, and thinks no one will recognise him.

  13. steve says:

    Old friend of mine went to a service where tongues was the norm and deliberately spoke some gibberish. He was promptly interpreted by someone else.

  14. She rides on a honda. She rides on a honda.

    etc etc

  15. One of my favourite real ones is one I hear every time I go to church…

    Skipjacktuna inadish inadish inadish

    Swot it sound’s like to me anyway :-)

  16. Carole says:


    No, not tongues, though it sounds like some I’ve heard. Just a playground ‘dip’ from my childhood. In fact, I used this when invited to allow the tongues to flow at a Catholic Charismatic seminar. One of our teenagers settled on “Bonjour, je m’appelle Helen”, another, “Vorsprung durch technik”. Others, good Catholics, went for ‘In nomine patris et filii et spiritus sancti”. Bottom set GCSE French students were thin on the ground, so thankfully no “Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir?” Few opted for the baby monosyllables that the priest encouraged us to start with.

    I logged on earlier and thought, “oh, poo! I’m not getting caught up in the old tongues debate again, am I.” Before I say anything else, let me stress, I do not have a problem with the spiritual gift in principle. I have encountered people that I am convinced have the gift. I would dearly love to have it myself, if only to settle the thing once and for all (this hardly convinces God of my worthiness, I’m sure!). But in many cases I am not convinced. I read somewhere (it may have been in Alpha resources) that a certain well-known speaker on the Christian talk circuit claims to have never prayed for anyone to receive the gift of tongues and it hasn’t happened. It seems that at first she just prays in tongues and asks them to repeat after her and, hey presto, after a few repetitions they pray so fluently that they could carry on a fully fledged conversation with any sympathetic native speaker of that particular angelic tongue. HELLO!!! THE EMPEROR ISN’T WEARING ANY CLOTHES!!! I’m sorry, but by my definition, this is copying or mimicry, not receiving a gift. Even I can do that. It is not the gift as such that bothers me, but rather the elitism that it promotes. It leads to Premier League prayers and Coca Cola league prayers. People can get very picky over who administers prayer ministry to them. I think I am still kicking shins in the Sunday League! :lol:

    I remember having a deeply moving spiritual experience at a meeting once. I was walking on air for about a fortnight afterwards. I was utterly convinced that I was now a pure spiritual being. Unfortunately, this meant that meals went uncooked, laundry unwashed and the home untended. I quickly learned that whilst it is good to have a taste of the spiritual realm, we are called to live and function in the material world. A priest mate of mine used to be very into the charismatic movement at one time. Now, he says, you can’t live “up there” all the time. He reckons that most of his buddies from his charismatic days are now moving into more contemplative ways. That may be quieter but, personally, I don’t know whether it is any less “up there” than tongues and arm waving. For the majority of us it is good, now and again, to have a glimpse of how it could/will be but too much and it can become addictive and a distraction from the life we are called to live in this world.
    I have rattled on too long. I apologise if this reflection causes offence to anyone – that truly is not my intention, but I find but it is something that I, personally, find challenging. I am always prepared to listen to convincing argument.

  17. I don’t really get tongues. I do have a few words that I believe are genuine. I use them sometimes. I prefer talking to God in a language I understand though it has to be said.

    The church I grew up in insisted that if ever you were in a place where people used tongues, you were in danger and must leave. They were in the ‘these things have passed away’ camp.

    In all honesty, I find it hard to care.

  18. steve says:

    To be honest it makes no sense to me either. I don’t want to mystify my relationship with God or make it too subjective. It’s hard enough to maintain already.

  19. Robb says:

    This made me laugh. I have been there and seen that!

  20. I just love how you will tackle any topic at all with a fearlessness I would like to have in my own life! Hey! You could lay hands on me and pray in tongues and maybe then I, too, would be as fearless! :-)

    I do believe in speaking in tongues, but agree with most of the comments above that there sure is a lot of fake, way more than the real.


  21. Barry says:

    “See my tie, see my tie shin up a drainpipe. I’ll have a double Bacardi and a Kaliber shandy. A lass with a Calor gas heater can seek a man’s coriander, but she came on a Honda.”

    My thoughts on tongues are here: http://tinyurl.com/2rfbsk

  22. Carole says:

    Some interesting observations and comments there, Barry.

    As a struggling linguist, I wouldn’t say no to the odd outbreak of xenoglossia myself.

  23. Robb says:

    How very cunning of you :P

  24. SheenaC says:

    Your ‘toons always prompt such interesting discussion! Tongues – now – always has been a contentious subject, ever since I was a slip of a Christian!

    I was not gifted tongues until 4 years ago (I think it’s about 4 years), although I have been a Christian for over 40 years. I delight in tongues, because I use them to speak to God when my own language runs out! I only ever use tongues aloud when I am alone. If I am praying for someone I also use tongues, but under my breath. I have never felt prompted to speak tongues alound in Church – quite apart from anything else, I would need to feel assured that there is an interpreter present.

    As regards any folk who are out there ‘faking’ tongues – that’s between them and God. For myself, God gave me tongues to use, so I use them – I would never refuse any of His gifts.

  25. jonbirch says:

    thanks shelly. :-) glossolalia is a lovely word.

    steve… ‘fiestamondeogolf’…your tongues sounds like police radio. :-)

    thanks sheena… you echo my own sentiments… or do i echo yours? :-)

    hi elle… i spend most of my life fearful… i guess fearlessness has to escape from me somehow. honestly, i can’t work out why i get such profound anxiety and disfunction and yet am bold regarding my observations and thoughts. i guess what i’m saying is… i’m scared too. :-)

    thank you barry. :-)

    ‘In all honesty, I find it hard to care.’
    i’m not sure it matters too much either allatsea. if you want tongues, receive them, just don’t bug everyone else with the noises you make. it’s rude. :-)

    hi dennis… god may have laughed his head off… he may have cried his heart out too. heck… he is god… he could do both at the same time if he wanted to. :-) :-(

    hey khs… i’m not sure what your point is… translation anyone?

  26. jonbirch says:

    carole, some very interesting thoughts re. charisma and contemplation being two sides of the same coin in as much as they can be equally ‘up there’. thank you. :-)

    cheers ben. that sounds wise. :-)

    subo. meeeeeow! …that was snowy speaking in tongues. :-)

    hey viking fru. it’s good to giggle. :-)

  27. sarah says:

    Loving it.

    Echo Carole’s thoughts.

    And oso providing an anchor.

    As a linguist I like to see it as a tool for restoring relationships – someone and God, someone and someone else, particularly if it ends up being their language.

    It’s a very wide thing, a psychical thing, a way of reaching back through time and setting things out with God there in a way that is creative, synapse-nourishing, sometimes therapeutic.

    But, like everything else, it’s just a tool – it’s a means to an end. In this case, communication.

    That’s why the interpreter is so important.

    Sas x

  28. Jon

    I didn’t mean I find it hard to care in a rude way. I do find the topic interesting. I just find it hard to worry about it anymore.

    When I joined the charismatic church, I used to worry that I wasn’t safe/saved because I didn’t speak in tongues. Then when I did, I used to be jealous of people who spoke in tongues more or better than me. God obviously liked them more than me. People used to pray that God would give them a second heavenly language or expand the one they had.

    Cool and all that. But there’s people dying on the inside because they think God doesn’t love them because they can’t speak in tongues. And there’s people terrified they aren’t proper Christians because they don’t have theat gift.

    Somehow I think the whole thing just got too big and too important.

    Just my slightly-negative-I-suppose thoughts on the whole thing really.

    Hmmmm :-/

  29. andrew says:

    It’s weird I have just been having a conversation about gifts and speaking in toungs with some of the guys in my youth group, they don’t get the whole speaking in tounges thing and feel really sceptical about it.

    It’s a shame really because something so special has been made into a bit of a joke. I’ve been reading chapters 12, 13, and 14 of 1 Cor and Paul’s saying that although he wishes everyone could speak in tounges we have to remember that for gifts (any gift) to be used correctly it must be to build up the Church and he then devotes a whole chapter to the importance of Love when it comes to using gifts. Finally he almost says how can tounges build others up when they can’t understand what is being said. That’s my interpretation anyway.

    I just feel it’s a real shame that there is scepticism and jokes about gifts particularly tounges when it has been through the misuse and general fabrication for selfish means that has got us to this point

  30. steve says:

    Jon. ‘fiestamondeogolf’ is from the fast show.

  31. Carole says:

    “It’s a shame really because something so special has been made into a bit of a joke.”

    Hi Andrew. You’re so right. I am the first to admit that I have treated the thing quite lightly, but that is just because it is my way of dealing with something I don’t really understand (a bit like your mates, I suppose) But as you can see, just reading through the comments, the misuse or fabrication of this gift can cause more than a bit of anxiety to people. Someone said that people will pretend to have the gift because of peer pressure within their church. How awful is that? I take comfort in the fact that there are other gifts to be had, so the gift of tongues, for all the interest it may generate, is not the be all and end all. Maybe God has a really special gift lined up for me. :-)

  32. Robb says:

    I personally give thanks for people who display the spiritual gift of cleaning the church toilets. I also give thanks for those with the gift of saying something that edifies me when at just the point when I am at my lowest. I would also like to give thanks for those who have the gift of praying for me when I don’t feel able to pray for myself. And whilst I’m at it, I would like to give thanks for those who have the gift of smiling at just the right moment with some honesty that cuts through and shows me that someone really knows.


  33. Carole says:

    Oh, Robb, that was beautiful. I shall be edified by that prayer next time I’m scouring the lavvies at our gaff.

    It reminded me of a talk I heard by Mike Yaconelli. He said how much we always hear about the gifts of teaching and preaching. He talked about the gift of earthiness. As a somewhat earthy person myself, I had never thought about that as a gift – but you know, the more I think about it… No-one ever recognises the gift of ‘plodding’. A mate of mine comes up with reasonably dynamic ideas. That, he says, is his gift. But he doesn’t act on his ideas – he has a team of plodders to do that.

    Any other unsung gifts?

  34. jonbirch says:

    aah… the fast show… scorchio! …eth eth eth eth eth eth eth! …suit you sir! … today i am mostly eating bourbon biscuits! … aren’t tongues brilliant?! BRILLIANT!

    allatsea… i wasn’t saying you were being rude. far from it. i understood your point fully and i agree with your sentiments completely.. i meant it is rude of people speaking in tongues to inflict their gift on other people… a bit like always hogging the conversation or shouting people down. :-)

  35. sarah says:

    Spiritual gifts are there to help us navigate the spiritual realm, take our feet off the ground, restore ourselves to ourselves, and grow into the divinity God has for us.

    They’re the lost part of who we were before the fall.

    But they’re not the only kinds of gift.

    Emotional gifts – the gift of empathy, the gift of sympathy.

    Physical gifts-being a fantastic runner.

    Mental gifts – being a chess player.

    And then they mix, and we can’t quantify it…

    Becoming rounded, becoming whole, all to help our fellow man.

    Sas x

  36. jonbirch says:

    hey robb and carole… i’d like to thank my mother, my father… and my agent! :-)

  37. Robb says:

    @carole – sorry, I’m not anything special myself… I had Yak Yak Yak by Mike Yakonelli in mind when I thought of the gift of cleaning toilets… but the rest was in my head…

  38. ben says:

    with the Honda thing, got a funny story to tell. my bros friend was at a church and someone started saying “boughdahunda” funnily enough. there was no interpreter so he says “yeah ive got a honda, what about it?” :D

  39. sarah says:

    Ben -Official “Welcome!”

    welcome mate

    Sas x

  40. su says:

    you, – meeeeeow! …that was snowy speaking in tongues. – great to hear Snowy’s a full gosple super dog member,

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