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About jonbirch

animator, illustrator, character designer, graphic designer. music producer/recording musician. co-owner of PROOST. proost.co.uk
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22 Responses to 447

  1. Chris F says:

    Well I ‘m not sure I’d let my daughter out wearing diving flippers either!

    What a dilemma though. I know I have to let them go, let them make their mistakes and cannot protect them for ever. All I can do is to suggest the likely outcome of their choices; and be there when they need to come home, with the father’s welcome. I hope they know they can always come home…

  2. FSWood says:

    They’re yours yet also their own.
    The border line between is ofttimes difficult to locate and a bit of a hazy airbrushed one at that.

    And certain personlaities will push the matter in order to find out for sure where the limits are: what is seemingly rebellion may be a search for security.

    Yet, there also is outright obstinate rebellion – when we meet in Eternity look up Jonah, he might have a few tales to tell about rebellion and consequences.
    (spooky thing is God might have a few tales to tell about me, ouch!)

    Yes, children can go overboard testing the limits and parents can go overboard on how tight those limits are. Time, openness, love, listening, respect, and trial and error (soemtimes it’s more like “error and trial”) will, in theory, lead to balance.

    Heart wrenching thing is realizing the kid is going to have to take a fall before it gets through his head. My stepson is exhibit A.
    (and seems bent on continually demonstrating so. ho-hum. oh well, such is life.)
    Stepdaughter realized early that actions and decisions have not only immediate but also future consequences and has suffered rather less trial and trauma in her life.

    The concept of off in the future consequences is hardest to get across the the “live in the moment”, “I’ll live forever” adolescent crowd. Don’t ask me how I know that!
    But then again, if younger ones weren’t testing limits and looking for challenge and adventure and giving us older ones more grey hair, because either that spirit was either squelched or stillborn, how many advancements and discoveries would not happen, would not have happened?
    To a point, human life needs that.

    Looking at, were not the Disciples and Early Church to some eyes rebellious and exceeding the boundaries as seen by the general society?
    Perhaps certain churches are in decline on account of having lost that near-reckless edge?

    And it is now time to step down from the soapbox.


  3. A S Hodel says:

    Jeff Weddle’s Anti-Itch Meditation recently discussed the annoying habit of Christians to give advice … and since I gave a supporting comment, I’ll have to refrain from a “bumper sticker” style response.

    I will say that the 13-14 year olds I teach in sunday school are shocked to hear that I’ve taught my kids to argue with me since they were pre-teens. (Now that they’re in college, this approach has advantages and disadvantages.) I in turn tell the group that I want them to argue with me – but to be prepared to explain their position if I challenge them back.

    The fact that they are shocked by that discussion seems somehow relevant to the cartoon. We’ve only raised two at our house, so it may not be appropriate to generalize.

  4. AnneDroid says:

    We’ve been in a nice wee bubble for a few years, with our kids, who’re between toddlerhood and adolescence. The bubble is starting to burst…

    After various recent arguments (mostly about her clothes – strangely enough!) I found myself (to my surprise) realising I was the one who had to apologise. I explained yesterday to my dear 12 year old that it was a big change for me, having decided the entire contents of her wardrobe all this time to find myself out of that particular job and to realise that in fact this is the way it should be. I hadn’t realised I had to make a transition too. Ax

  5. Robb says:

    And that is why I don’t have kids. Have you seen a pic of my wife? Same thoughts :lol:

  6. dadube says:

    Well, I’m thinking at least she came and told her dad she was going out instead of sneaking away….
    Not that I’ve ever done anything like that you understand. :)

  7. I thought she looked pretty Hot! She could always stay in and surf the internet and become just like US?……………… now there’s a thought!

  8. soniamain says:

    that was me!!, and will no doubt soon be facing it with my 2 daughters- very scary thought!

  9. Tamara says:

    I’m only 18, and therefore have no experience of this, and I’ve given my parents quite opposite experiences such as them asking me to wear clothes that show off my figure a bit more. What? Jeans and a t-shirt isn’t good enough?

    Anyway, point is… parents and children rarely ever see eye to eye.

  10. Robb says:

    Love the <a href=”http://www.bbc.co.uk/wear/content/images/2006/11/06/sidjamesgallery_470x353.gif”stereotypical dad from the 60’s reading the paper :lol:

    Bless this house!

  11. Robb says:

    I did it again!!

    Love the stereotypical dad from the 60’s reading the paper :lol:

    Bless this house!

  12. Robb says:

    Oh I give up. I know it’s only 11AM but I think I should head off down the pub!

  13. Mimou says:

    Some Glaswegian teens (a lot in fact) wear the latter – we were just wondeirng the other day how their parents let them out like that.. NOT something you see in Scandinavia! It’s too cold ;)

  14. Carole says:

    When I was at university, we used to discuss ‘issues’ in French and Spanish lessons. Every so often, the foreign students would criticise British girls for going out at night wearing next to nothing, even in the depths of winter. Seemed to me that the foreign lads loved it, though it was debatable whether they would take any of these skimpily clad lasses home to meet mum (typical double standards).

    When one of my colleagues on the course took her year out at a French university, she dressed in a strappy little short dress when she went out for the evening. She was a delightful young woman, a real sweetie, but was hounded by a French guy. In her giggly, girly way she enquired as to why he continuously flirted around her. “Becoz you look lak a whore,” was his gallant response. She was deeply upset by this. She’d totally misread the cultural cues.

    With this in mind, my own daughter was despatched off to university in France this year with parental advice to follow a strictly casual but covered up dress code. The Lord blessed her with an ample bosom (she must get it from her dad, it’s certainly not from me!) and she is inclined to wear things a bit on the revealing side though to be fair I don’t think she realises. I often have to do the subtle tugging at my jumper gesture, much to her annoyance. Now she is in Spain which is ten times worse – the machismo thing still leads to rather unsubtle behaviour on the part of men there. Another girl I know who spent a year in Spain had natural blond hair but dyed it dark to put a halt to the unwanted attention. Her boyfriend visited her and couldn’t believe the fact that men would stare straight at her boobs even in his company. That is just plain rude.

  15. jonbirch says:

    funny carole… that’s my next cartoon. :-)

  16. Robb says:

    I’m all prepped to examine it later :lol:

  17. Carole says:

    That sounds like a line from Carry on Doctor or summat! Just make sure you’ve warmed your hands first. :lol:

  18. Robb says:

    Totally unrelated… I love that new advert for kitchen roll!! Nearly as good as trials and tribilations!!

  19. I dressed like this too, for many years not just as a teenager.
    raised a strict catholic with a ragaholic dad mum and uncle the story of my boobds began at age 9 when I was tugging at a swimming costume to pull it over my flat chest. My dad leaned over the picnic rug in lechlade and tugged sharply at my costume and PULLED IT DOWN saying ‘ You have nothing to hide in.

    This from a father who never ever touched or cuddle me was a shock and remains a memory of the beginning of an unconscious blue print about the way I will be getting attention from men in the future.

    50 years later I am still waiting to heal becuase the attention I never got from my father meant I was starved and eager for a man to be interested in any part of me and of course with raging hormones why should anyone’s face matter.

    So Dad’s how do you affirm your daughters and how do you deal with your own sexual feelings toward women and your own daughter??

    I find some of the comment in fact most so immensely shallow

    and am glad to have my own inner aware thanks to the therapy group and ongoing prayer from church members and my christain friend.

  20. Clare says:

    Carole, I think you raise something relevant when you say (14) that your daughter ‘doesn’t always realise’ the revealing effect of her clothes. I can clearly remember not understanding what on earth all the fuss was about when I wanted to go out in jeans with huge rips in the arse. There is an innocence in youth – despite the veneer of sophistication! I know at that age I just didn’t imagine quite HOW interesting men would find it looking at my knickers!!! Or what they might surmise about me from the fact they were on show. Oh dear. How one manages that dynamic as a parent, I just can’t imagine…Krys, (19) I was very lucky to have a Dad who affirmed me in a healthy way and you are right to highlight the importance of this. Dads are massively important to their daughters. In fact, if you are a dad reading this, I can pretty much guarantee you have NO IDEA how influential your behaviour will be on the rest of your daughter’s life. So it’s kind of important to wrestle with these difficult issues.

  21. Carole says:

    Yes, Clare there is an innocence in youth. I can remember at 16 suddenly discovering that I was in possession of something incredibly powerful. I worked in a large organisation and suddenly, after numerous bouts of unrequited love where boys my own age were concerned, I had men old enough to be my father (and much older) fawning over me. If I made mistakes in my work, all would be made OK with a flutter of the eyelashes and a sway of the hips. I didn’t know what it was I had but I found it all very exciting and slightly dangerous. The blossoming of a young woman is a beautiful thing – trouble is most of them don’t quite know how to control it.

  22. sarah says:

    Don’t let her go out. It’s that simple.

    Sas x

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